I hate third grade.

It’s been said that one learns something new every day. Lately, I’ve been learning something new every hour, it seems.

A friend of mine said a few days ago ‘If stress is supposed to make you thinner, I’d be invisible.’ ‘Amen,’ I thought, glancing down at my not-so-skinny self. Many of you know the recent events with my baby cousin’s case, and it has taken a huge toll on me. I can finally TRY to function again, but it still eats at my heart daily. We can’t do anything but hurry up and wait, and I ask for everyone’s prayers to continue on so many different levels.

Becca is tired of the third grade, and I am, too. The Benchmark crap infuriates me. It stemmed from one of Bush’s mistakes, so why is my baby still having to stay until dinner-time two nights a week (she is honor roll so it’s not like she needs extra help…..they pressure ALL third-graders to go on Mondays and Tuesdays after school ) for Benchmark prep, in addition to the HOURS a day they make them hunker over the same boring practice tests, redundant classwork with sample problems, rather than her actively LEARNING. I’m so tired of the kids being DRILLED CONSTANTLY BY THE ENTIRE SCHOOL STAFF. Benchmarks are a CONSTANT DAILY REMINDER to these kids. They are ready to vomit by the time it comes around (next week).

The deal with Benchmarks above other standardized tests is that the schools, ESCPECIALLY the ones who have sucked in the past, HAVE to have good marks to prove they are doing their job, or else they start losing authority of their schools, and possibly funding (if I remember correctly). So it ALL comes down to people trying to keep their jobs and the bottom dollar on the yearly budget.

Basically, if the kids do bad, the teachers look like they aren’t doing their job. THEREFORE, to prove they did better than the year previous, they NEGLECT MY CHILD’S EDUCATION TO STUFF MULTIPLE CHOICE QUESTIONS DOWN HER THROAT, PAGES AT A TIME. I wish I had saved the social studies work Becca has been given this year. And don‘t be mistaken that it‘s a lot. They spend about 30 minutes one afternoon and give them a test the next day, or something to that effect.

It’s horrendous and some of the crap has NOTHING to do with civics. It‘s questions like, “If a friend asked you to do something bad or break the law, would you?” wtcrap? Isn‘t that what they should be learning in Sunday School? I suspect it’s more benchmark crap they squeezed into a social studies lesson by throwing the word ‘law’ into it. And then the next question would be ‘Who’s the first President?’ (which my daughter has known for at LEAST three years), then ‘Who built the first car?’ ?????????????? Actually, I’ve just this moment had a revelation….the reason they stick random crap like that together is because they are combining lessons in that subject so they can SAY they covered the material, but actually use the extra time for….what? More Benchmark crap, I’m sure.

I’m highly offended by this because I have gone to college to study American history. My child has learned more about America from The History Channel and Johnny Horton songs than she’s EVER learned in her years of school COMBINED. Why? Because the school administration is apparently TERRIFIED of looking bad so they are obsessed with getting good scores. “It’s not their fault,” one may say. I said that, too, until this year, when I’ve watched my little girl collapse and sleep as soon as she gets in from school.

When I’ve seen things my daughter SHOULD be learning and she’s not because they are ‘practicing for Benchmark.’ Okay, guys, you know Varsity Blues and how freaking obsessed they were over football? That’s the way they are over Benchmarks. I’m angry because if the teachers REALLY gave half a damn, instead of using all this energy having special pep assemblies (am I fooling you? NO. They actually have damned pep assemblies for the freaking test) and figuring out sneaky ways to steal from my daughter‘s VALUABLE (in her ONLY SHOT AT AN EDUCATION) time to shove more Benchmark at her to make THEMSELVES look good, they would INSTEAD use that time to go to CONGRESS and REFUSE TO DO IT FOR THE SAKE OF OUR CHILDREN, then that would be a lot easier and quicker, and better for our KIDS.

It’s laziness. All of the time all the teachers in the nation spend on all the kids in the nation to answer all the right questions in the nation….think of the time and energy WASTED. THAT’S why I said it would be easier for all of them as a whole to go to Congress rather than continue like ZOMBIES, and in the process making our kids HATE school. Kids who used to LOVE learning….Paperwork is easier to many teachers than actually interacting all day every day, so many of them have gotten lazy. As long as they get good scores, who cares. They don’t get paid enough anyways. If they ARE great teachers and the kids do bad on the test, they could lose their jobs, so screw it. They hand out the papers.

My daughter this week is told to PRACTICE GOING TO BED 30 MINUTES EARLY, waking up 15 minutes early, PRACTICE WEARING COMFORTABLE SHOES….a WEEK before the test, mind you, being told what kind of breakfasts and snacks to eat, advised not to wear jewelry. She is so freaking stressed about this test. She mentions it at least a few times a day. And they’ll probably kick it into high gear the rest of the week b/c there’s only a few days left. Is it because they care about her performance this year and how much she’s ACTUALLY learned and gained from her experience, or are they just tripping because they want THEMSELVES to look good? Hmmm, I think we all know the answer to that.

Okay, this turned into I hate third grade, and I was really going to talk about dirt track racing. Perhaps next time….